CCT 28-1_LR

My wife and I learned early on in marriage that honoring and enjoying gender differences is the fast track to marital satisfaction. We can waste time trying to change each other, or we can have fun with each other’s quirkiness. When I appreciate our differences, I see my wife as person ally autographed by God. Celebrating the differences between men and women grows curiosity and fascination between a husband and wife. These differences are meant to build up a marriage. We are equal, yet different. Our dif ferences bond us and create oneness. Perhaps you have heard it said, “If your spouse was just like you, one of you would not be needed.” One of my favorite pictures of marriage is found in Genesis 2. In the Creation story, God paints a beautiful picture of a man and woman walking side by side through the garden together. Genesis 2:18 (NIV) reads, “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’” The word helper implies that the man needs someone to come alongside him where he is lacking. The Hebrew word for helper in Genesis 2:18 is ezer , which means one who helps . It refers to someone who comes along side to offer assistance. In Genesis 2:20-22 (NIV), God creates the woman and brings her to the man. This is the first wedding: “So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.” God did not take a bone from Adam’s head, implying that the

woman should rule over man. He did not take a bone from Adam’s foot, suggesting that the man should rule over the woman. He took the bone from Adam’s side. Husband and wife walk side by side through the garden and life together. You have your spouse by your side through every blessing, challenge, opportunity, and storm. God gave you a spouse to come alongside you and offer assistance. He did not give you a spouse as a replacement for Himself. Your spouse is not your source of life. We get to be helpers . We love, honor, encourage, and sup port one another. God’s plan for your marriage is to spend your lifetime helping and serving one another, side by side. As a pastor, I regularly honor men in our congregation. We must cheer on every husband and father as they step up to the plate to lead in the home. I want to give a standing ovation to every man who loves his wife well and remains faithful to the end. I am grateful for men who get up early, work hard, and provide for their families. I celebrate fathers who lovingly lead their children and do so without exasperation. I applaud fathers who teach their boys to be young men who regard women as highly valuable and teach their daughters how women should be treated. Homes of honor esteem men and women as highly valuable. Let’s praise our Father in Heaven for His won derful design of male and female. ✠

He did not give you a spouse as a replacement for Himself. Your spouse is not your source of life. We get to be helpers .

TED CUNNINGHAM, MACE, is the founding pastor of Woodland Hills Family Church in Branson, Missouri. He is a graduate of Liberty University and

Dallas Theological Seminary.

55

christian counseling today VOL. 28 NO. 1