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HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS

You grow and become your best selves in living life with others. We all need a community of a few trusted friends to support our growing journey of becoming real and being the best versions of ourselves.

Sharon May, Ph.D., conducts Safe Haven Marriage Intensives and co-hosts the “Love Well” membership program, helping people grow to become safe havens and love well. For further infor mation on intensives or to join the Safe Haven community program or get the Dragon Workbook, go to www.safe havenrelationshipcenter.com or e-mail grow@havenofsafety.com.

The following are a few things to remember as you journey to “love well” to gain the health and well-being benefits of good relationships. 1. Be a safe haven. Be there for others. Show up and show you care. Life is difficult for all of us. We all have two stories: one that tells about all that is good in life and another that tells about the difficult and painful struggles in life. We all need a kind and loving person to show up and be there for us in the good and difficult times. 2. Be on a becoming journey. Relationships are messy. You might believe that all your relationship issues are everyone else’s fault. However, that is not true. You cannot keep blaming everyone else for your relationship difficulties. Begin a journey of growing, understanding yourself, becoming real, and being the best version of yourself. Understand what triggers you, learn to slow down and think things through before reacting, manage your emotions, and respond in loving ways. Healthy peo ple are deeply rooted and centered in what matters most in life. Although not perfect, they are aware of them selves, able to take on others’ perspectives, and balance their needs with others. 3. Be in a Becoming Real community. Loving well is a complex and challenging journey that takes inten tionality. Learning to love well is not done in isolation. You grow and become your best selves in living life with others. We all need a community of a few trusted friends to support our growing journey of becoming real and being the best versions of ourselves. This is where you are known in the shelter of trusted others and can risk being vulnerable and share your life journey while learning from each other. These relationships are nourishing to one’s soul. “I was stuck in an empty marriage, and felt I could not share my struggles with anyone, but hearing the stories of others let me know I am not alone,” is a familiar story we hear in our virtual Becoming Real community groups for women and couples. Find a community of a few trusted people with whom you can share your joys and struggles and, along the way, be challenged to grow so you can love better. 4. Be willing to ask for help. When it is too difficult to do the relationship repairs and reconnection on your own, seek help. Keeping secret the unresolved rift be tween you and your spouse or you and a family member only feeds your shame and builds isolation. Reach out and get support. In the safety of relationships with others, we learn more about ourselves, become refined, and are chal lenged to grow and become our very best. In the shelter of our valuable relationships, we can live wholeheartedly and thrive in life. ;

Endnotes 1 Waldinger, R., & Schultz, M. (2023). The good life: Lessons from the world’s longest scientific study of happiness. Simon & Schuster: New York. p. 1.

2 Waldinger, R., & Schultz, M. (2023). p. 10. 3 Waldinger, R., & Schultz, M. (2023). p. 10.

Hope and Healing for the Whole Person For over 30 years, The Center • A Place of HOPE has been helping people change their lives for good. Our treatment programs are unique and life changing. We look at the “whole person”, not just the parts they want us to see. We dig deeper, walking alongside our clients with customized care and treatment plans aimed at healing our clients emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

We understand pain and, more importantly recovery. We specialize in the treatment of: • Depression • Addiction • Anxiety • PTSD • Eating Disorders • Co-Occurring Issues

Are you a professional counselor or clergy? The Center • A Place of HOPE provides a dedicated faith-based track for all clients who desire it. We would love to visit with you about our referral program and how we can be the right solution for your clients who need intensive, compassionate care. Faith-Based Track for Your Clients

1.888.771.5166 info@aplaceofhope.com aplaceofhope.com

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” - Jeremiah 29:11

28 Christian Counseling Connection